Dumb [duhm] adj: Intern Canton Cook

MOOD: onigiri- dillusional(WTF??)
Quote Of The Day: “The peanut M&M without the peanut.” -Intern Jon

So I was gonna write about something else, but honestly; I think this has way more entertainment value than what I initially was gonna post. So you guys know how I have a very retarded Intern Canton Cook now right? I really don’t have any patience for dumb folks. I’m sorry if I seem insensitive, but I will be a smart ass to you if you ask me stupid ass questions. How the hell do you function in society being as dumb as you are? Not only are you a waste of space, you are also sucking up my oxygen. SMH. Even though I think being dumb is a legit handicap, I don’t think I have to cater to you because of it. I’m not being mean when I call her dumb, and I will now illustrate that by the following example. Ahem…

So the hot water in our building wasn’t working earlier this week. I guess there was something wrong with the broiler? Not sure, but someone came out to fix it. The weather is way too cold to be washing your hands in straight up ice water so we need the hot water. After the dude came to fix it, one of our co-workers, William was checking the guys restroom to see if the hot water was running, and he passed by Intern Canton Cook’s desk as she was getting up to use the restroom so he said “Can you go check to see if there is hot water in the restroom?” And, (brace yourself folks…) Intern Canton Cook said “How am I supposed to check? Like stick my hand in the toilet? O_o”

true story

Folks, I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried. That is really what she said. I think my pupils dilated when heard that. William just stared at her like “Is this b!tch for real? Should I answer that?!” And everyone just paused. Then William suddenly yelled out “I’m talkin’about the facet water!! You know the one you wash your hands with??” And she said “Ohhhh. Ok.” I mean… REALLY?? DID WE JUST REALLY EXPERIENCE THIS?? This heffa said, “How am I supposed to check? Like stick my hand in the toilet? O_o”

Now let’s stop and think about this for a minute. How the hell did you figure he was talkin’ about the toilet water?? When the hell of all your years of being alive have you experienced hot toilet bowl water?? Why the hell would you think that’s what he’s referring to? Do we look like the type of place that offers ass steamers? I’m just sayin!! Of course he means the facet! *EPIC FAIL OF THE WHOLE ASIAN RACE* When this story started going around the office, me and Intern Jon had a text convo.

2012-11-30 15.43.51

I rest my case. >_>


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