Using The Shit Out This Turtle!!

MOOD:  (Ahahaha)
Quote Of The Day: “Ok, well I’ve decided that I’m gonna buy a turtle. When an emergency comes, I’m gonna grab it and put it on my head!” -Kenny

Today me and Kenny had the funniest damn conversation about turtles. Unfortunately, I don’t think it translate well, but here goes:

Me: You know we have a hurricane coming! They’re bracing themselves in New Orleans, and I told reason A to wash out two woks and get ‘em ready too!! (To put over our heads in case of emergencies)
Kenny: ROFLMAO!! Now that’s some funny shit!
Me: This isn’t a laughing matter!! This is serious stuff!! You might be laughing now, but you’re gonna be screwed when it comes, cuz we won’t give you a wok for your head! >_<
Kenny: Ok, well I’ve decided that I’m gonna buy a turtle. When an emergency comes, I’m gonna grab it and put it on my head!
Me: ROFLMAO!!! Ahahaha.. OMG I can just picture it. You with a turtle on your head!! Ahaha!!
Me: Poor turtle!! XD
Kenny: Yup, and he’s gonna grab a hold of my head and we’re gonna run for dear life!!
Kenny: (*Pretending like he’s talkin’ to the turtle) Grab on tight turtle!! We’re making a run for it!!
Kenny: See, this is what us guys do in hard times! We stick together!!
Me: I wanna interview the turtle as he’s holding on for dear life and you’re running. Excuse me, Mr. Turtle, can you tell me what your views on life is right now?
Turtle: Life sure is rough. O_O;; Its hard out here for a turtle. >_>
Kenny: >_> Damn turtle. I’m gonna poke the hell out of its shell!! Wait, no! I’m gonna knock on the shell so he can’t sleep at night! Muahaha…
Me: OMFG!! You can’t abuse the damn turtle!! I’m gonna get revenge for him!! (*Pokes you like a mad woman)
Kenny: I’m gonna block you with the turtle!! XD
Me: Well damn!!
Kenny: Yup!! Now that’s how you use a damn turtle!! Muahaha.
Me: Poor turtle.
Kenny: Then after dinner, we’re gonna flip it on its back and spin it!! And whoever the head lands on is who gets to do the dishes! Dude! This is the most useful turtle ever!!
Me: Lol!!
Me: Oh hell. You know what? When we have kids in the future, and they’re too short to reach the sink to brush their teeth at night, they can use the turtle as a stool and stand on it! Man!! We’re using the shit out this turtle!! XD
Kenny: I think our turtle wants to commit suicide. O_O He wants to jump off the dinner table to his death, but his damn shell saves him every time. >_<

Tell me that was not the most retarded conversation ever!! Lol. Most of me and Kenny’s convos are like that. -__-;; But he does know I freakin’ LOVE turtles!! So we’re gonna have a pet turtle in the future!! Heck yeah!! I also love emu and geese, but I don’t think we can have them as pets. >_>

Side note to PETA: No turtles were hurt during this convo. Thank you.


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